It was foolish to doubt him
Though her interest was piqued to an insatiable level, her inner critic still had a lot to say. Meditation was great for relaxing and falling asleep, but to see things? Meet a being? Hardly plausible. Her mind raced as she settled into position to listen to the guide walk her through the process. She laid in bed and listened to the guides voice closely.
They began with the normal breathing exercises, slowly in through the nose, 1, 2, 3, hold 1, 2, 3, slowly out through the mouth 1, 2, 3. This continued for a few moments until she relaxed comfortably into a slow, intentional breathing rhythm. Listening most intently she envisioned herself being engulfed slowly from toes to head in a warm, happy color. A color, she decided, that was a beautiful blue green. This color formed a cocoon like capsule around her, surrounding her with a warm, happy feeling. “This cocoon was light and soft, so light,” mentioned the guide, “that (she) felt herself rising up and away from her bed.” She knew she wasn’t actually floating, but the sensation of her consciousness floating upwards was very real, though her body remained still.
“See and feel yourself rising up and away towards densely populated clouds in the sky,” the guide continued. She saw it, felt it, floating towards these large white cumulus formations in the sky. So big were they, that they encompassed much of the visible sky. She no longer felt the bed underneath her or sensed the room around her. She was fully devoted to this vision, this conscious retreat that she was experiencing. As she floated weightlessly through the sky towards the clouds, the guide proceeded to describe the next section of this quest. She saw herself floating directly into one of the clouds, the largest cloud. Her cocoon carried her directed into the cloud, where it gently bumped into the edge of a moderately sized floating landscape, like a boat washing ashore. At the behest of her guide, she took in the visual appearance first.
“What did the land look like” the guide asked. Forest floor, lush and green, she thought.
“This is where your deity resides, this is your inner temple for them. What does it look like?” large, curved trunks of oak trees arched towards each other, forming an entryway deeper into a thick forest, a sacred place, of that she was sure.
“You walk into your temple now, towards the center, what do you see?” the guide questioned. Now she saw an old, worn path through the dense forest. Taking that path, one foot in front of the other, slowly, cautiously…she continued. She walked the path for what seemed like a long distance, twisting, and turning around large trees that blocked out the sun with their wide canopy. She walked, touching the trunks now and then and feeling the cool bark under her palm and slowly running her fingers over the weathered shell. Eventually her consciousness came upon a clearing, though clear of trees there was still very little light making its way down to her. Dark and misty, she took a deep breath, she could almost smell the earthy aroma of the underbrush around her.
“Now is the time, you approach the center of your temple. You see your deity, what do they do? What do they look like? Do you feel anything?” the guide pressed on.
This was it, it was time to meet him. She walked towards the center of the clearing, there was an enormous tree in the center of the clearing, larger than any other tree she had seen. It towered over the clearing, its canopy was the reason there was so little light coming through. Only streaks of sunlight, emboldened by the mist, lead her way towards the outline of a great shape. She could make out a large being, antlers as wide as the trunk of the tree, seated on the ground, cross-legged. Animals appeared from nowhere, quietly watching as she approached the figure. The being was large, she could tell even as he was seated. He stood. She stopped and looked on in awe. He was massive, tall and lean. Dark features, brilliant green eyes that shone like emeralds cutting through the mist. He stepped closer to her. She took a step back. Her consciousness was…what was it? Scared? She wasn’t sure what she was feeling. Wasn’t this all just her imagination anyways? Why was she so taken aback? He took another step. She paused, holding her breath. She didn’t know what to say, or do. He knelt before her, coming closer to mortal level with her eyes. He had to have been close to ten feet tall. She felt…so small beside him. He just gazed at her, tilting his head now and then, studying her. He smiled.
A low growl of a voice rolled over her “child” he said simply. Sincerity, concern, almost sorrowful feelings dripped from the single word. She felt weak. She fell forwards, crumpling into his arms as he wrapped her in a bear hug, the likes of which she had never knew she needed. “Child, it is time”. She didn’t understand, she hid her head from view. “Child” he raised her chin with his long, pointed fingers. “You can be happy. Trust the universe, trust yourself. Make your own way. It is time.” He released her and stood. It was time to go now, the guide whispered. She felt…content. She felt…permission to be herself, to be wholly happy with herself. She felt pride. She knew her deity, she respected him, and he her. She felt a rush of wind as her consciousness retreated, back through the path, the forest, out onto the edge of the landscape, into her cocoon, rushing back down into her bedroom and gasping as she awoke from her meditation. She was…different. She felt different. As she got up from her bed, she looked towards the mirror. By the gods she had changed. Where a normal woman had laid moments before, there stood something completely different. Something that could bring joy to those around it, something that could have fun, and be silly just for the sake of being silly. Something that didn’t have time to be worried about what others thought, so long as she was happy, she would keep moving forward. There stood The Frisky Faun.